Sunday’s Column: What To Wear What to Wear

Aug 4, 2013 by

On the night preceding the first day of high school, I spent more time figuring out what I was going to wear than I did sleeping.

Let’s face it. The first outfit pretty much pegs you for the year. Miss it, and you were hosed, relegated to the likes of those who get locked in their lockers or hung by their underwear in the gym shower.

I popped down to the kitchen that first morning and my mother just stared at me. The question was along the lines of ‘What do you think you are wearing?’ The tone was more ‘Where is my son?’ and ‘Are you out of your freaking mind?’

I had the latest ‘cool’ tennis shoes. I didn’t play tennis, but back then that’s what they called them. My dad was griping about the cost of the shoes (and this was before Nike existed and Michael Jordan had yet to shoot a hoop.) I had assembled some Levi blue jeans and what I thought was a pretty cool T-shirt, and no, it did not say Aeropostale.

But by the time my mom was done with me, I was in penny loafers, khakis and a button down collared shirt. Underneath said shirt was a white undershirt. She was saying something about how all gentlemen wear undershirts with dress shirts, but back then, an undershirt screamed loser.

There was always next year on that whole impression thing.

Fast forward to this week and the SONs of Thunder. I am of the mindset that if the boys keep their grades up and meet the school dress code, they can wear what they want. There is one other stipulation, though: they’d better be in the car on time. I do not enjoy having to park the car and walk them in because we (they) are late.

The boys take the clothes issue to heart. Each has his own personality, and each has his own unique style of attire. The Little Black Dress says I have an ornery streak, not in a mean way, but sort of ‘fun’ ornery. She says I’m getting back at my parents for making me look ‘nice’ at school, so I’m reliving my school days through the boys.

As if. On that first day of school, when I walked into my class and was the only one not in jeans, I wasn’t tagged at all. I’ve never even thought about it since then.

Each of the SONs is his own person and it shows. The eldest goes with the crowd, though he does have a tendency to wear those hiking pants that unzip at the knees. I rarely see him in blue jeans, which are my go-to wear.

Middle SON likes to stay warm. By this, I mean that he thinks nothing of going outside in long pants, a sweatshirt and possibly a hoodie … when it’s 90 degrees outside. The youngest is basically your California surfer dude. HE often chooses those long shorts that go below the knee, usually plaid, and paired with a Hawaiian shirt. We try to make him wear shoes.

But they are set – with clothes I mean. The ridiculous school supply list, basically on par with our mortgage, is completed as well. Fodder for another column.

For now, we wait. It’s going to be an early morning on Tuesday.

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