Oh Sure, Let’s Put The Christmas Tree Up Now And Have Family Time And …
I believe we should celebrate holidays when they show up. You know, like on the calendar.
This means I am one of those old farts who is not happy when he walks into his favorite “tool” store and the Christmas trees and inflatable Santas are up. And it’s not even Halloween. WTWhatever.
Our rule is the Christmas installation process cannot commence until after Thanksgiving. Period. Over my dead body.
So tonight we’re putting up the Christmas tree. And it’s fake – another first for our clan. Fake tree. Christmas going up before Thanksgiving. And yes, my dog and cat do sleep together. But not in that way.
This has not been a fun year. And if the Little Black Dress wants to get Christmas going early to get in the spirit, that’s fine. And we’ll just gather the family around and decorate and have loads of fun.
Yeah, right.
At first I was pretty pumped. The fake tree was already lit, so there would be no eye-gouging as in past years when I would wrap the lights around the tree with the needles of death.
And now we’ll let the Sons of Thunder put on the Christmas balls. And listen to them scream and yell at each other because Son No. 1 put a ball in the exact spot on the 9-foot tree where Son No. 2 was going to put his ball. And No. 2 Son is now standing on Son No. 3’s hand, who in turn is trying to put a ball on the cat.
No, you may not throw the balls at each other. No, you may not yell, we are going to have “family time.” No, you may not hit/kick/kill your brother, it’s Christmas. No, you may not stand on the top rung of the six-foot ladder. No, you may not touch the sacred glass ornaments that came across on the Mayflower.
Crash.
Oops.
The LBD is going to The Point. Now, The Point is just that – and where we hope to build our dream home one day. Right now, it’s the place where the LBD and I go to talk, think, plan. It’s also where we go to get away from the Sounds of Thunder so they will be able to grow up. The LBD is using the latter excuse right now.
Of course, we all had to first hear the lecture about it’s Christmas and it’s about family and is there a single reason YOU BOYS can’t get along and all that. And we all keep reminding the LBD she can only whisper – doctor’s orders.
And yes, that’s just what she wanted to be reminded of – especially at that moment. Not wise on our parts. So the Sons head to The Point with the LBD. Probably to make sure she doesn’t bring back a a big rock or something.
But eventually everyone seems to calm down. It might be from us watching the geese flying low across the water; or just seeing the tiny sliver of moon tonight; or staring into yet another fire; or watching the LBD flip lightning bolts between her hands.
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Earlier I mentioned the Christmas installation process. I will not bore you with all the details and decorating that makes “Christmas” stores look like amateurs when compared to the LBD’s North Pole 2.
Let us just say that everyone has their own tree. yes, everyone, and decorated with their own motif. Mine is covered with sailboats and fly fishing goodies. And yes, we even have a “wedding tree.” And yes, it’s exactly what you think it is – decorated with various odds and ends from our wedding.
And then there is The Tree. The one where the Mormon Tabernacle Choir would feel right at home singing the Hallelujah Chorus every time they saw it. I will admit, there is a Shekinah Glory about it.
The LBD loves Christmas. She love it because she can decorate to her heart’s content. When she is in the Zone, one is well advised to stay out of the way and not cause any problems. The Sons still have so much to learn about the Ways.
And she loves it even more for what it really represents. It’s about the birth of our Savior. It’s not about what it’s becoming – a huge marketing/advertising/selling holiday that gets earlier and earlier every year.
Earlier every year so we can get “into the spirit,” you know, the spirit of buying more and more stuff. And to make sure we don’t offend anyone, let’s just say Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas.
Somehow a day celebrating the birth of Christ has turned into the biggest “buy” day/week/month/and now months, we have. I wonder how other religions would feel – and react – if retailers tried to turn Hanukkah, Ramadan or Diwali into another “Happy Holiday.”
Ever notice retailers have yet to turn Easter into another Christmas?
Maybe we Christians should just flip the dog and start focusing more on Easter as “our” real holiday. Yes, there would be no Easter without Christmas, but the purpose of Christmas was to ensure there would be an Easter.
So despite a fake tree and decorations up more than a month early, Merry Christmas to all.
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