Manual Rocks And Technology Fails

Jun 10, 2010 by winjaw

Technology is taking over our lives. These devices, designed to ease our “burdens,” often create more.

Ever have to reboot a piece of paper?

Yes, some are great – the ice maker for example. And the fact I can put an entire bookshelf of CDs on a tiny handheld device has quite a cool factor.

Yet technology has its limits. And there are certain things no Apple or other corporate fruit will ever beat.

I speak of the lowly fly swatter.  

For some reason, the common house fly decided our abode was a quite suitable habitat for poker games, fly ball and general peskiness. I abhor flies.

We tried a couple of those electric fly swatters. Nice concept, but I swear some flies are already electrified, thus immune.  There is a rather satisfying “zap” when one is successful.

There is also a rather pungent aroma when said fly sticks to said electric swatter and, well, basically fries.  The other problem is you sometimes forget it’s made of hard plastic and you slam it down on the table. The fly is killed, smashed and zapped, but you are also out a rather expensive toy.

So on her thrice-daily trip to the big-box-store-with-everything, I asked the Little Black Dress to pick up a fly swatter. Just a fly swatter, the kind my grandmother used.
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She came back; with five. And some “guaranteed” devices you stick in the corners of your windows; and fly paper; and fly sticks; and some type of fly glue; and other armaments.  An aside, it is impossible to extract oneself from fly paper. Instead of tasering suspects, our law enforcement would do well to invest in fly paper guns.

Anyway, I wanted a fly swatter. What I got was the Ginsu knives complete with the steamer.  So I let the Sons of Thunder and The Dress set up their traps. And we waited. And waited. And after an hour or two we have about that many in their fancy traps.

Alert readers will recall I have certain gifts, among those being the gift of fly swatting.

So after tolerating the Sons checking their traps every 43 seconds and complaining about them “not working,” I went to work.

Sixteen minutes. 73 confirmed kills (I had to literally sweep them in a pile and be counted by a so-called “third-party” to count).  A first – my first triple – three flies, one swat.

Awesomeness is in the house; and thank you, but that’s enough fawning.

Technology is great; great if we don’t let it control our lives. And if we remember there are some things technology will never replace. Technology will never replace family and friends.

So quit reading already and go play with your kids.  And tell your spouse you love them.