The Mommy Hotline

Oct 31, 2010 by winjaw

Kids have it easy.

Back in my day, you forgot to bring your homework home, well, just turn around. That’s after we went to the proverbial woodshed.

And going back meant walking up the mountain (both ways), through the blinding sandstorm and then the haunted forest, all the while fighting off the Mongol horde. And forget about shoes, borrowing the team and buggy or even getting to use the mule.

Today, we have the Mommy Hotline. Forget your homework? No problem, we’ll just use a myriad of electronic devices sent over the air and through the wires to make sure whatever Son of Thunder forgot this time doesn’t get in trouble.

Nowadays, the middle Son of Thunder appears to lead in the “Voted Most Likely To Forget” category.  

As in what happened at least twice last week. However, his razor wit response to the proverbial why? is rather straightforward.

“I forgot.”

As if forgetting disallows the flagrant violation. Yet in his eyes it does – he thinks he gets a free pass since he forgot. It’s not his fault he forgot, so since he forgot how could he be blamed for not bringing home his homework. Or something like that.
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Anyway, the Little Black Dress will get on the phone – either the portable landline version or her mobile. And she’ll call another mommy whose child did not forget. And they will converse about said homework.

And Mommy No. 2 will then take the homework from her responsible child (responsible as in actually remembering to bring said homework actually home) and proceed to copy and/or scan the necessary paperwork. They – they being the LBD and Mommy No. 2 – then will discuss various delivery options.

Why mess with getting in the car? We’ll just simply fax it. Don’t have a fax? Why then we’ll just e-mail it to you and then we can print it off on our copier/printer/scanner/coffee maker.

And pretty soon we won’t even have to go  to all this trouble, because said homework will be online and we can just download it ourselves. Which to me at least means it’s not really homework, but whatever.

Kids have it easy.